He Left the Seminary and Chose Love Instead

I had just returned home from school one evening when my mom approached me with some news. “You’re going to have a long vacation, so Father Clement will be coming over occasionally to give you home tuition.” “Father Clement?” I asked, puzzled. “Yes, Father Clement. Don’t you know him?” she replied. “He’s Mr. Hayford’s son who’s in the seminary.” “Oh, that? But he’s not a priest yet!”

I was in my third year of senior high school, preparing for my final exams, and my mom thought I needed extra help. During my vacation, Clement came by most evenings to tutor me. We developed a strong bond and even started attending Mass together. We had plenty of time to chat about various topics.

Since he was training to become a priest, I was cautious in my interactions with him, but he often hinted that no topic was off-limits. We discussed life, school, faith, and frequently talked about the Eucharist.

After I finished school and returned home, he was mostly still at school. We called each other whenever we could.

One day, I asked him, “Why do you want to become a priest?” I expected a long explanation about a divine calling, but he simply said, “My father wanted to be a priest at one point in his life but couldn’t due to circumstances beyond his control. So, from the moment I was born, he called me Father and told everyone I would become a Catholic priest when I grew up.”

“So, you’re essentially living your father’s dream?” I inquired. He replied, “Yes, it’s my father’s dream, but I’ve also fallen in love with it and made it my own. God called me through my father, and I responded.”

At that moment, I couldn’t deny that I had developed feelings for him. He didn’t do much, but the little things he did resonated deeply with me. Whenever I was with him, I admired his intelligence and how adeptly he navigated life’s challenges, but he was on the path to priesthood, so I tried not to get my hopes up.

He had completed his postgraduate studies and was nearing priesthood when I decided it was time to confront my feelings. “I’m going to meet him at school, and while we’re alone, I’ll tell him how I truly feel. There are only two possible outcomes—he either says yes or no, and neither answer can kill me,” I reassured myself.

Yet, a small voice in my head warned me against my plan. Ultimately, I went through with it. I confessed my love for him and pleaded for him to say yes, even if it was a lie.

He was taken aback, unable to believe what he was hearing. He thought I was joking and suspected I was sent to test his commitment to becoming a priest. He asked me not to bring it up again and walked away. For the next month, he avoided me. I had taken a risk, and it had backfired. I tried to reach out, but he didn’t respond.

After several months of silence, he came to my house looking for me. “I’m sorry about everything. I was scared you were sent to test my faith. The truth is, I’ve had feelings for you too, but I always pushed them aside.” We talked for hours that day and continued our conversations over the phone after he left.

He didn’t say yes or no, but something shifted. The way he spoke to me and the tone of his messages became softer. One day, during a vacation, we kissed. He still didn’t verbally confirm anything, but I took that kiss as an affirmation of my feelings.

Despite being deeply in love, I found myself grappling with lingering questions about our relationship. He was slowly becoming a priest who couldn’t marry. “What does our future hold?” I wondered.

There was no clear path for us. We were intimate while pretending not to care about the future, but deep down, we did.

Each day brought him closer to the altar and further away from me. One morning, he sent me a message and followed it up with a call. He was direct and didn’t mince words. “My conscience is tormenting me. Every time I go to Mass and take communion, I feel like I’m living a lie. I don’t feel connected to my calling anymore.”

I sensed where the conversation was heading and feared he was about to end things. He continued, “I can’t keep doing this, so last night I confessed everything to our vicar. I told him about us and how far we’ve gone. I prayed for forgiveness. I don’t want to live this lie when I can choose a path that makes me happy. I’m leaving the seminary.”

I gasped, “What? Are you serious? When did you decide this?” A flood of questions rushed through my mind, but the answer was simple: “I’m leaving the seminary for you.”

It wasn’t an easy choice, considering the consequences. His family opposed his decision, and his father threatened to disown him. Friends and relatives tried to dissuade him, but he remained resolute. He said, “Becoming a priest is my father’s wish. I could pursue that path, but if I end up in adultery and get kicked out, I wouldn’t be the only one to bear the shame.”

He chose me, and today we are happily married with our second child on the way. His father sees me as the reason his son didn’t become a priest and barely speaks to me, but the joy I share with Clement outweighs any resentment. I strive every day to be a good daughter-in-law, just as Clement didn’t stop choosing me against all odds.

—Naomi  
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