When Marriage Took Away My Best Sister

The first time I saw Patricia was when I was a student at the university, and she was almost a sister to me from the very beginning. Our parents got to know each other, and I was going to her family's funerals while she was coming to mine. After getting our degrees, we both ended up working in the same company, albeit in different areas as she was in the northern part while I was still in Nakuru. Our friendship was not affected by miles.

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After serving the nation, I moved to her city, and the company decided to keep us both. She offered me to stay at her place when I was packing to go, and I accepted it without hesitation. We were sisters anyway! This was in 2014-2015. I got married in 2016, and Patricia was right there with me as my maid of honour.

Patricia and I had the chance to share a two-bedroom apartment after my wedding while my husband was traveling a lot because of the distance. When the pregnancy was mine, it was Patricia who took care of me she was with me at hospital appointments, helped me with morning sickness, and made sure I was in good health.

My mother regularly prayed for Patricia, asking God to grant her a good man and a family of her own, just like her heavenly blessing for me. Even after my daughter was born, our friendship was still intact. Although we finally lived in different towns within the same region, our friendship triangle was not affected.

When moved back to Nakuru after my second child was born, Patricia got married to the guy she had been in love with since our college days in 2021. My family and I were present to support her, and I was as thrilled as on my own wedding day.

She intended to have me as her matron of honor, but since I was so heavily involved in the wedding planning, another friend of hers took over. The good thing is that my daughter was one of the little girls who brought her flowers. The night before the wedding, she called asking for Ksh800 as an emergency to pay for her dress, and I told my husband to give her the money.

There was another time, she asked for Ksh2,000. This time I was a little reluctant and said I would have to talk to my husband first. Then, shortly after, she called back to say she had got the money.

In her WhatsApp status right after the wedding, she talked about friends that let you down. I answered, worried, asking if everything was ok and who had treated her badly. She replied that I wasn't her only friend and hinted that if the shoe fit, I should wear it. That took me by surprise.

After a little exchange, she accused me of gossiping about her at her wedding. I had never done that, but she said that someone had heard me saying that she married a man only after her money. Why would I say such a thing about my sister? And even if I had, why would I say it at her wedding?

I attempted to explain my side, but she interjected, perhaps even blocking my number and changing hers. Eventually, I got hold of her new number and instructed my husband to contact her on my behalf, but she still treated me as if I was an unfamiliar person. Later, I demanded the money back that I had lent her for the dress, but her reply was a clear signal that she was not going to return it. Therefore, the end of our friendship was in 2021.

In the year 2023, she contacted my brother and sister, begging them to intercede for my forgiveness. I told her that I had forgiven her, but we could not be as close as we used to be. She said, “The person who spread rumors about you at my wedding was trying to destroy our friendship. I should have realized you wouldn’t do that to me.” I would say that time has passed but I still decided to give her a further opportunity.

The moment my father died, she called me to talk about funeral arrangements and to make suggestions on how to ease the situation. I said yes and put my trust in her. But a week before the funeral, she called and said that she couldn’t be there because she was very pregnant.

I was thinking, “If she was aware of her pregnancy, then why did she put me in a situation where I had to depend on her? Is she playing with my feelings?” On the day of the funeral, she even called me to say that her husband would come, but he did not show up.