The Woman Who Loved My Husband Unknowingly

I found out about my husband’s affair three months back. There was an incoming message from Uncle Richard saying, “When are we going to have a repeat of last night? Let’s do it very soon. I love you.” while he was sitting at the table with his phone.

Uncle Richard is my husband’s maternal uncle who resides in a different country. The next day I took his phone and went through the chats between him and Uncle Richard. It turns out that she is indeed Susan, a beautiful wife, and single mother who owns a successful shop in town. It is very evident through their conversations that my husband is always the one who expresses his gratitude, as Susan constantly gives him reasons to be thankful.

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Usually, such text messages would completely break a wife’s heart and leave her crying all night long but I didn’t respond like that. This was not my first experience with cheating. The main reason I wasn’t feeling emotion or sorrow was that I understood Susan to be a co-victim of this whole affair. She was completely unaware of the fact that my husband was married with two kids.

He had mastered her with a story of being a victim of bad relationships. He informed her that he had been with a woman for three years and was about to marry her when she got pregnant by another man who was rich. Being sympathetic, Susan told him, “That’s how the bad women treat the good men and the latter become bad ones in the next relationship.”

Susan is a good-hearted person. I used to read Susan’s and my husband’s messages every night by picking up my husband’s phone. “Night Owl” is the sweet nickname she gives him. I’m curious about its origin, but it appears to be very important because my husband sends heart emojis every time she refers to it.

She sends him pictures of her day and even sends him her photographs telling him “I found this – I think you’ll love it”. That is how we get those items and by a totally different narrative. He would say he got them on sale or perhaps it was a present from a friend overseas. Susan would send pictures of herself at church and say, “I prayed for you. This week you’ll win big.”

Their chats are always nice, so it’s clear that Susan is very considerate and mature. She does not cross the line of intimacy in her conversations. With respect, they talk about it. One night, after a few more questions, Susan asked my husband if he was going to travel abroad and he eagerly replied, “Hell yes!” She continued, “We can plan it.”

It often crosses my mind, “What did he do to be granted a love like Susan? What has he told her that made her trust him?”

I really feel sorry for them when I think about the future of their relationship. My heart goes out to Susan, as I have come to like her and think she is a better person than my husband. A man will then have to start winning her heart who will be bringing in flowers and the truth. But, unfortunately, she remains with the falsehoods which my husband gives her as her reality.

I want to rescue her, but first, I need to rescue myself. Our second son is still very little, just eleven months and he surely needs a stable and peaceful environment, not a chaotic one. I am also about to get a new job far from our current place. After I get that job, I will take the kids and go, and then I will file for divorce.

At this moment, by confronting him with my knowledge, he would eventually capitulate and express regret, probably enlisting my parents to win them over to his side. They would then tell me, “For the children's sake, forgive him.”

That's what happened the first time. When it happened again, however, I decided not to involve my parents. I quietly resolved the matter with him, and he reassured me that it would be the last time. When he did it again, he used his uncle's name as a cover for his deceit.

“Does Susan know that her name is saved as Uncle Richard on my husband's phone?” I chuckle to myself.

She is totally unaware. A woman like Susan who is so loving and considerate deserves nothing less than a fully committed man, not a husband that is only half-hearted. She is not only energetic but also has a life of her own. You may wonder why Susan hasn't done anything to reveal the truth about my husband. But the fact is, a woman in love can easily get blinded by her feelings. No matter how intelligent or astute she may be, intense love the kind that weakens your knees can easily mislead. Maybe she is looking for love. Perhaps she wants a man whom her son can call daddy. Or maybe she is just seeking a home where the warmth of a real partner prevails, which is why she mistook my husband as the one who could provide it. I can't blame her; I have been there myself. It is only that my situation of still living with an unfaithful husband greatly hinders me from criticizing her.

What causes me more pain is the realization that it is I who shall be the one to tear her heart apart, not my spouse. It might happen that one day, I call her to say, “You are dating my husband.” She is likely to respond with an accusation against me of being dishonest. Then I will have to produce evidence for my claim, and she will give in, her heart lying broken on the floor. I do wish that when the day arrives I can give her strength to cry, and she will deem me worthy and thereby lean on me too, because we both are the victims of a man's treacherous heart.

—Audrey

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