The Secret Reason for His Request to Move In

I am going to share a story that was inspired by a post I saw a few days ago. A woman named Rita told about her encounter with a boyfriend who asked to live with her. My tale is quite alike. After dating Alfred for two months I finally invited him over. As soon as he stepped into my big house surrounded by a big garden and with high ceilings, he was speechless and asked, “Are you alone in this huge house? Don't you get scared?” I just smiled and said, “No problem. I love being in a large space.”

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Out of the blue, Alfred was turned into a person with wants. He started off with little requests, “Babe, my phone is not working well,” or “Babe, I need a little money. I'll pay you back like soon.” A guy who never complained openly was then having monthly crises over money. But that was not all. He claimed to be living with me and slowly deposited his stuff at my place just like the character in the post I read. First was the toothbrush, next a pair of slippers, T-shirt came last. One day I spotted a pair of sneakers under my bed as if he was already in.

That’s the point I woke up. I stopped everything I was doing with him and carefully watched his moves and requests nowadays.

Then one night, he popped the great question: “Mansa, you are living in this great house alone while I’m taking care of another rent. Let me move in so we can speed up the wedding.”

At first, I did not show any reaction. I just laughed and replied, “It seems an excellent idea! Next month my rent is due, Ksh 25,000 for a month, and I have already paid for two years. How about we split it: you bear the current year’s rent and I’ll be responsible for the next year’s rent?”

He gave a smile in return, but it was not an easy one. He said, “Really? Oh my God, let’s see how it goes. I will come back to you later about that.” Then, slowly like a thief, he started taking his stuff out of my place one at a time. First, the toothbrush was gone. Next, the slippers. Then the towel. After some time, I glanced around, and it dawned on me that everything that belonged to him had silently gone. I was not surprised when soon after the relationship ended.

I must admit that I never rented that house, it was my parents’ house. I was just putting him to the test to see if he would really put his money where his heart is, and the test showed his real intentions.

Therefore, to the lady who recounted her plight a few days ago and still was not sure whether it was a good idea to let him move in or not, here is my counsel: Men who are too and too ready to come and live with you should be watched. You never know, they might not love you they might just be looking for a free place to live. Keep your eyes open. Not every guy who leaves a toothbrush in your bathroom wants to marry you. Besides, he may be more interested in your address than your heart. It’s tenant-ship, not a relationship.

—Broni

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