From Humble Beginnings To Broken Hearts

So far, I have had two major relationships. The latest one came about while I was studying in a university, which was away from my hometown. My boyfriend was unaware of my residence until graduation. However, I still didn't want to take him to meet my family then. It wasn't so much about the distance, I just wanted to be sure that our relationship was heading toward the altar first.

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My eldest sister created a trend in our family about presenting boyfriends to the parents. The first man she introduced to her parents was the one she married, and so the other sister and I understood that we should not bring a guest unless we are seriously thinking about marriage. This ensures that our parents will not be disheartened in case the relationship does not work out.

For this reason, I was hesitant to present my ex-boyfriend to my family. I did not want my parents to have unrealistic expectations about our relationship. He was understanding when I voiced my worries.

"When the time is right for us to settle down, I will want to meet your parents but for now, I just want to know where you stay. If I call and you are not available, I should know where to find you, right?"

He made a valid argument. One day, when he was around and my parents were at the farm, I accepted the risk of showing him my house. It was not anything luxurious—just a small room shared by me, my parents, and my sister.

I told him about my living situation before inviting him there. He saw it at last and kept a straight face. I thought his reaction was a sign of his willingness to accept my low origin.

Still, after that day he acted differently. He turned out to be a stranger and was very harsh. At first, he said he was busy, but when it became too much I asked him if I had upset him. "Did I offend you in any way?"

He answered, "You are innocent. All is well."

One day, I was with him, and I got the chance to browse through his mobile. I just wanted to see if a lady was in the picture. What I found out was even worse than cheating—his infidelity.

I came across a chat between him and a friend of ours. When the friend had asked him about his visit to my house, he had replied, "She told me she comes from a poor family but I did not understand how bad it really was."

I was unable to read the chat any further. It was like my heart got broken into a million pieces. I told myself that from that moment on that I would keep my distance from him. He had already been acting distant, plus learning that he had changed his feelings due to my living conditions was enough for me to break up with him. The three years we had spent together had made me believe that our love was stronger than any prejudice he might have against my background, but I was wrong.

That was a breakup two years ago. I am now in my late twenties and I feel ready to love again. My family is making great efforts to move us, but it's still a work in progress. I am questioning whether I should take the risk of getting hurt while still living in a room with my family or should I wait until my situation improves.

—Awura

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